When LOVE is a pain

I'm waiting for the autumn leaves to fall
Letting time to pass by
Taking away all the pain of love
So that winter could freeze this heart
And I'll suffer no more

Cloudy, oh so cloudy

why so cloudy?
i want the bright autumn sky back to shine through my cloudy heart and turn it clear and bright.

why the emo-ness lately eli?
yes eli, you've been doing fine so far. why do you start thinking of him again while he's watching you no more..
STOP looking back!

why so cloudy?
I dont like it cloudy, 'cause sadness is in front of my eyes when I look at you, sky.

why so cloudy?
oh dear Sky, you make me so lazy even when I have a strong will to study hard

why not cheer up eli?
'cause my autumn sky isnt there.. 'cause missing you is such a pain in the heart, and in the ass..


ah poor eli, but eli can get through all these :)
I have faith that eli can do it
Be strong, girl
'cause you're a lucky girl, no more a poor girl (:

I miss YOU deeply

I still remember the times where you were always there for me
I still remember how it felt like to have you
I still remember how much love you gave me
I still remember the moment you first confessed to me

It all echoed in my head
Echoed in my heart and flashbacks started to play..

I miss having you with me, cheering me up all the way 'cause you've never liked seeing me frown. I miss holding you're hands whenever I walk beside you. I miss the comfy hugs you gave me whenever I wasnt at ease. I miss your smile that even without any words, I knew you were saying " it's gonna be alright (: ". I miss your funny cute lovely text messages that turned my cloudy day into a bright awesome day.

I miss your presence in my life. I miss you. I miss you deeply.

It's Been a While ...

... since my last 17

the moment in life where you are seen as a young adult

the moment where I feel sweet & grown up

... since you left my life

the heart has been empty since the day you went away

wait, NO

you're shadow is still inside, just a black and white memory

colouring my days with sadness

... since I last found my happiness

the girls of my comfort zone

the only place where I know they would always have a smile for me

no matter how broken I am, they will always have their most welcome

... since I know I survived

seeing you walk away was the hardest goodbye

the falling tears couldn't represent how broken this poor girl was

wondering why you left behind the memories so easily

left this heart wanders with no direction

broken, and empty

... since I can smile and move on

realising that you are no longer a world to me

made my most sweetest smile fade away

but life has to move on

you have, and so it was my turn to start smiling like how I used to

... since my new life has begun

no loneliness but a lot of happiness

I've opened a new book which is ready to be filled with new chapters

Welcome home,

Eli :)